higherpowermoment.com

Yes, I know I promised you a post on “Have I ever done anything I could have been arrested for if only I were caught? What have those things been?”.

Yes, I know this isn’t the topic.

Yes, I know it’s been over a month since my last post.

No, it’s not true that the reason I haven’t posted it is because I don’t want to answer the question “Have I ever done anything I could have been arrested for if only I were caught? What have those things been?”. Although I don’t really want to answer that question.

In fact, the programme and I have not been getting on very well recently. I’ve been going to meetings and thinking, well, I’m hating this, why am I here? And I’ve not been talking to people in the fellowship, or using my sponsor, or really doing anything of the stuff that’s suggested. And it felt, well, pretty hypocritical to be writing about the 12 step programme when I’m not working it.

The good news, for me, for today, if anyone is interested, is that whatever low-level malaise that was affecting me over the past few months seems to be lifting. Tonight a Daniel Johnston song came on Spotify (don’t you just love Spotify?), and for the first time in a long while I got the kind of spiritual lift that sometimes it seems that music can give me. Here’s the song. I can’t talk any more as I have a meeting to get to.

Audio clip: Adobe Flash Player (version 9 or above) is required to play this audio clip. Download the latest version here. You also need to have JavaScript enabled in your browser.

Daniel Johnston - Life in Vain

Next topic: we’ll deal with that tomorrow.

It’s not just a question of being nice for the sake of being nice. Anger and resentments, if not dealt with, will sooner or later make me think “hmmm… a drink would be a good idea”.  And now I’m a little while away from my last drink, sometimes this all seems a bit theoretical, a bit unlikely.  I can be pissed off and sober, right? But I only need to think of the number of times when I was active that anger/resentment was the excuse that launched a binge, and even in recovery the number of times that anger/resentment has given rise to drinking thoughts…  Nope, this is pretty practical, life-saving stuff.

So, for once, on topic, this is Selkirk’s Frightened Rabbit from their first album “Sing the Greys” (2006, remastered in 2007).  The second album “The Midnight Organ Fight” (rude) (2008) was grrreat, and I’m sure I’ll be plundering it for the purposes of this blog before long. If you can see them live, do. Brothers Scott and Grant Hutchinson are intense and have intensely impressive beards (the photo is in early beard stages - drummer Grant now looks like something that has come down from Appalachian Mountains). And they sound great. For any local readers, they are playing the Castle Keep, Newcastle upon Tyne (whacky!) on 26 February 2009. Tickets currently not available but I’ll stick up the link when I see it.

Audio clip: Adobe Flash Player (version 9 or above) is required to play this audio clip. Download the latest version here. You also need to have JavaScript enabled in your browser.

Frightened Rabbit - Be Less Rude

Next post will be a Burns Night Special.
Next topic: Being good to yourself.